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FetLife Highlights

Our Brief Introduction

FetLife Introduction

Fetlife is a combination of an adult dating site and social networking site. It is a safe space for members of the BDSM, fetishism, and kink communities to find like-minded people. Most of the site offers free features, but there is also the option to donate to support the site. This gives a few extra privileges for paying a monthly fee. 

With over eight million members all over the world signed up on Fetlife.com, all members can speak to one another through BDSM chat, private messaging, or group conversations. The functions and features of FetLife are similar to the social networking site Facebook. Read our review and take a closer look at this Fetlife website with our Fetlife review.

What Is Fetlife?

This site is one part social network, part dating site. It offers a safe community to talk and discuss with other members of the same social circles. With a lot of free features, there is nothing to lose when trying out this site.

The site was essentially created for men looking for a woman to share the same sexual fantasies. Instead of searching through regular dating sites, it gives the option to find it in an easier way, by searching through like-minded individuals. The site is also open to newbies who want to try BDSM.

When participating in Fetlife dating, members can post on one another’s wall (similar to Facebook). You may edit your profile as you wish.

Member Structure

FetLife Member

  • Around 8 million members
  • Average age: 25 - 34 years old
  • Members are mainly from USA

Male Members


Female Members


Out of the 8 million people on the site, more than half of the members of FetLife come from the United States. Most members are male on this site, with more than 75% being men. This does not mean that there are no female members on the site, it just means there are less female members than males. Most members are between the ages of 25-34 years old, meaning that most members are Millennials.

FetLife Login and Signup

FetLife Sign up

Signing up on Fetlife is easy and should only take a few minutes. It is also free.

  1. Basic information: Nickname, gender, sexual orientation, role, birthdate, location, and email address to create your account. 
  2. Mobile number to verify your account

You cannot use your other social media accounts to register.

Making Contact

Message other members for free
Search bar helps you easily find who you are looking for
Meet other members through the explore tab
Sending messages has a similar format to sending simple emails
Search for nearby members by clicking on Perv Kinkster Nearby on the conversations page

Making contact on Fetlife offers a few different options. You may search for other members using the FetLife search bar. This can be found on the left of any page on the site.

Find random members on the explore tab as well as in groups. You can send anyone a message similar to an email. Always be aware when you are messaging people because most people will put guidelines in their profile that you must follow before contacting them. 

Viewing any photos or videos of members is free for everyone, but if you pay for “support” the best photos will be filtered to come up first.

Sexually explicit content is common. You will see nude photos and videos of members doing sexual things. Do be aware that the site puts safety first, if you experience being harassed or disrespected by anyone you can block them.

By clicking on Perv Kinkster Nearby button, you can look for members around you. Your location on the site needs to be accurate, so confirm that it is set correctly.

Profile Quality

  • Fill-out six tabs of information sheets to complete your profile
  • Uploaded photos and videos are automatically displayed on your page
  • Your activities will be shown on your profile
  • Let your friends write on your wall and format their post the way they like
  • Friends and followers list can be found on the profile page

You can share as much or as little as you want to on your profile. There are six “tabs” to every member’s profile.

Tab 1: Information included from registration as well as your interests or what you are looking for in a partner.
Tab 2: Short bio. Format the text to make it look exciting and personalized.
Tab 3: Relationship with another member of FetLife. You can only do this if you are friends on the site.
Tab 4: Websites that you want your Fetlife friends to visit. This can be your social media sites or anything else.
Tab 5: Photos and videos.
Tab 6: Photos and videos (you may upload up to 5GB per video).

All activities you perform on the site will be shown on your profile. You also have the option to keep your profile private. This is recommended for security purposes.

You will see both empty profiles and complete profiles since you are not required to fill out anything completely. This allows you to choose to be discrete should you choose.

FetLife App

You may go to FetLife.vip to download. Unfortunately, it is not available on Google Play Store or the App Store. 

If you do have an iPhone, you can access the app through the mobile version on your browser. Around 70% of the members use the app or mobile version versus a desktop.

Other functions available on the app are the same as the desktop version, so you will not be missing out on any features.

Design and Usability

The design of FetLife is very easy to use. On the side of the page, you will even be able to find a FAQ list if you are having trouble using the site.

The colors of the site are black and gray with red texts. This can be frustrating for those who do not see very well, but it is supposed to go with the dark and mysterious theme of the site.

Special Features

Most of the features of FetLife are simple and similar to any other dating site, but there is one specific feature that stands out, this is “Fetishes”. This feature allows you to explore the fetishes that interest you

There are more than 60 fetishes to choose from, and when you click on the one of your choosing, you will be directed to groups and members with that interest. 

Cost and Payment

  • Messaging
  • Viewing of Photos and Videos
  • Join Groups
  • A sexy I Support FetLife badge on your profile.
  • Perv today’s most loved pictures and videos
  • Go back 25x further in your Friend Feed
  • Videos and discussion topics
  • View all the contents that you’ve “loved”
  • Design your feed however you want
  • Be one of the first people to access new features of FetLife

Most of the site is the same whether or not you pay. The only reason you would actually choose to pay is to “support” the site. They ask for a commitment of $5 per month, for either 6, 12, or 24 months, paid all at once. 

There is also a “Lifetime Support” option that you can purchase for $240.

Payment Options

There are many methods of “donation” on Fetlife such as:

♦ Bank Transfer
♦ Credit Card
♦ Direct Debit
♦ GiroPay
♦ Paysafecard
♦ Bitcoin

Privacy and Security

Fetlife offers a lot of security and privacy. If you have any concerns, send an email to [email protected]

If you need to delete anything you have added to your profile you can do so in your settings. Even if you want to delete Fetlife permanently, you can do so. Fetlife offers a variety of options to stay safe and private on the site.

All of the information on Fetlife is encrypted. Also, your deleted information will be automatically deleted on their servers.

Competitors of FetLife

Adult Friend Finder is one of the sites like Fetlife, as it is also somewhat of a social media site aligned with fetishes and BDSM. Another BDSM and fetish site is Alt.com. This site is also similar, but with fewer members

Real Life Review

AndrewFetLife User
Read More
"I'm a dominant male, and it is so hard to find submissive women in bed. I tried using the site, and I found some interesting members. Communication is easy since the app is free. But other members never reply or answer like jerks. FetLife is okay. Nothing to lose anyway since almost everything is free."
ChrisFetLife User
Read More
“Just to let anyone thinking of using fetlife know what really happens on there. You will find that the caretakers are very racist and sexist. I have now been discriminated against twice because i was honest and informed everyone on my profile that i am a romany traveller...something which incidentally i am proud to be. I posted a normal post similar to everyone elses...then a female decided to post a totally uncalled for and insulting comment. I pointed out that if she had no interest in my post that there was no need to comment at all...to which an argument unsued in the form of back and forth comments. The caretakers said absolutely nothing to her but penalised me for protecting myself from this needless harrassment yet again. Just making everyone aware of what fetlife is currently like and the sort of members that they now accept. You dont need to take my word for it.. join and experience it for yourselves”
AlliyahFetLife User
Read More
“Bdsm and kink is a scary place. You have to protect yourself as it does attract a lot of psychopath, sociopaths, abusers and people looking for there next target/victim. So when you join any website that has anything to do with anything of a sexual nature BE CAREFUL and go slow espocally if you are new in the scean. Fetlife is a safe place for noobies because you are in control of what happens and there are a lot of useful and helpful resorces. When you join don't chose a kink don't put up sexy pictures don't chime in on every discussion. Spend a week looking around if you see something interesting send a private message to the person who posted it then when you are ready update your profile and just give less info rather than more. Abusers will be attracted to fresh meet but you can block them. Respect others ideas and opinions dont kink shame or judge others and you will find FL an interesting and informative place.”


FetLife is a special site, offering a safe and effective way for members to open up about their sexual fantasies. Whether you have a specific fetish or are interested in BDSM, the Fetlife BDSM community offers a group of likeminded individuals, as well as resources to get started.


I Am Not Happy With FetLife. Can I Get My Money Back?

The site has a 7-day return policy on its support packages, but you cannot do so if you send your support through Gift card Trade-In, POLi, Paysafecard, or Bitcoin.

Can I Delete Fetlife Account?

Yes, you can easily go to your settings and delete your Fetlife account whenever you wish.

How Will My FetLife Support Look On My Credit Card Bill?

It will show up as BitLove Inc.

Can I Gift Support To Other FetLife Members?

Yes, do this by clicking “Gift support” located in a direct message with any member.

What Kind Of Sexual Fantasies Are Banned On FetLife?

FetLife does not allow pedophilia, incest, zoophilia, necrophilia, scat, and animal cruelty.

What Kind Of Video Formats Are Allowed To Be Uploaded To My FetLife Profile?

Any video file can be uploaded but it must be under 5GB. If you are having issues, contact Fetlife support.

What Is "Perv"?

Perv in FetLife simply means you have looked at something.

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